Menu Expand
Working with Troubled Children and Teenagers

Working with Troubled Children and Teenagers

Jonny Matthew

(2018)

Additional Information

Book Details

Abstract

Working with Troubled Children and Teenagers is an easy to understand guide packed with wisdom for anyone working with or caring for troubled children and teens.

Author Jonny Matthew has decades of experience of working with young people, and offers simple but hard-won advice about how to earn the trust and respect of even the most challenging young people. It all starts with you, the adult, adopting a position of respect and patience. It's only then that children and young people will start to respond. From this starting point, Jonny provides a wealth of practical advice across a wide range of challenging topics - from the use of touch and understanding boundaries through to repairing relationships when things break down. Jonny uses case examples and stories throughout to bring his advice to life.

This inspiring book is essential reading for any adult invested in improving the lives of troubled children, including youth workers, social workers, foster carers and child counsellors.


Working with Troubled Children and Teenagers will be a fantastic resource for those people who are doing just that for very low wages in thousands of settings every day. Easy to read and written in a chatty style, the book feels like having a conversation with someone who has spent their life working with young people who are in hard places. Jonny has and still is doing that work, and in this book he has distilled the things he has learnt about the importance of good relationship based work, into short, easily understood messages. If this book gets into the hands of the people at the coal face it will make a huge difference to the lives of troubled youngsters. I'd like to see it become a compulsory text for youth workers, teaching assistants, support workers and anyone else working directly with children and young people.
Ann Bell, Development Director Wales, Adoption UK
Jonny Matthew has decades of experience of working with young people, and has held positions such as Practice Change Lead at the Youth Justice Board Cymru, as well as being co-author of the Trauma Recovery Model. He lives in Bridgend.
Fasten your seatbelts; this is one heck of a read. As a practitioner in the field of youth work and psychotherapy for more years than I care to remember, I believe that this book is definitely essential reading for anyone working with troubled young people. The pages are full of the wisdom, insight and compassion that can only come from years of frontline work, personal reflection and indeed sleepless nights. Jonny Matthew knows what he is talking about....but more than that, this book is a genuine testimony to the power and transformative impact of empathy and the presence of 'one good adult' in the life of a young person. The honesty, humour and at times vulnerability of the author will challenge you to inquire into your own work practice, your attitudes and values. Allow yourself to embody the richness and sensitivity of this powerful book and you too will experience nurturing, support and renewed energy for your work.
Brian Johnston, Director, Candle Youth Services, Dublin (provider of training placements, court ordered supervision and youth work services)
Jonny's huge wealth of understanding and his work with young people through Youth Justice projects clearly comes through. He's presents all his experience and knowledge in a way that is so accessible to frontline practitioners. Each time we engage with him it becomes ever more clear that we need his compassion and understanding of our trouble young people communicating to a much wider audience.
Sheila Taylor MBE, Chief Executive of National Working Group on Child Sexual Exploitation (NWG)

Table of Contents

Section Title Page Action Price
Working with Troubled Children and Teenagers – Jonny Matthew 3
Welcome 11
Introduction 15
1. Respect 19
How do you see troubled kids? 19
Seeing things differently 21
Seeing changes everything 22
The ingredients of respect 22
The power of respect 25
Self-respect as an engine of real change 26
2. Trust 28
What is trust? 28
Qualifications aren’t enough 29
Sequencing matters 30
It’s tough on our own 31
Unique pain 32
The power of neglect 32
Earn it: first, by hanging in there 34
Comply or else 37
Wrong message 38
Sequencing again 39
3. Motivation 40
Why do such challenging work? 41
Poor reasons for working with children and young people 41
The best reason for working with children and young people 44
4. Expectations 45
Laying the groundwork 45
Aim high and speak ‘up’ to young people 47
Expect the unexpected! 51
5. Listening 54
The impact of being ignored 55
Listening as an instrument of change 55
Being ignored changes our behaviour 56
Troubled kids’ behaviour is affected too 57
So how do we really listen? 58
6. Giving 63
Nuts and bolts 63
The monkey isn’t enough on its own 64
Be honest 65
Self as an instrument of change 69
Important caveats 70
7. Boundaries and Integrity 71
Freedom? 71
Professional boundaries 72
The ‘good’ worker 73
Know your role 73
No compromise 75
Work the process 78
Have your cake and eat it 79
8. Act 80
DO something! 80
Delivery is everything – the 3 Cs 82
Do the job 87
9. Persevere 88
Setbacks 88
The territory 89
Keeping going 90
Remembering your ‘why’ 90
Capturing your ‘why’ 91
My ‘why’ 92
Five benefits of remembering your ‘why’ 92
How to remember your ‘why’ 94
Distinctiveness 95
10. Touch 97
Touch is normal 98
Experience of touch 98
Negative touch 99
OK touch 100
Relationship first 101
Asking permission 101
Touching and calming 102
Benefits of touch 103
A quick summary 105
11. Payback 106
Seeing children change 106
Delay the reaper 107
Celebrating prevention (the invisible investment) 108
What didn’t happen 109
Progress 110
Trans-generational impact 111
12. Icing 113
Remembering 113
Effort 116
Honouring 117
Humour 118
Not a cake 120
13. Your No.1 Client 121
Fit for purpose 122
Compassion fatigue 122
Impacts 123
Nose to the wall 124
Making the change 126
Practical hacks 127
Act now 130
Conclusion 132
Learning 132
The soul of the work 133
Recommended Reading 135
Blank Page