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Brotherly Feelings

Brotherly Feelings

Sam Frender | Robin Schiffmiller

(2007)

Abstract

It isn't easy being eight years old and having an older brother whom other children often misunderstand. They don't realize that when he doesn't laugh at their jokes it's because he doesn't understand them. They don't know that when he doesn't speak to them or look at them it's because he doesn't know what to say or how to make eye contact. They don't realize that he behaves this way because he has something called Asperger's Syndrome.

Sam knows that his brother Eric is different from him because his brain works differently. So, when the other children bully Eric, it makes Sam feel protective of him. But sometimes, when Eric behaves oddly, Sam feels embarrassed too. Sometimes, when Eric gets lots of attention, it makes Sam feel resentful - then, when he considers that Eric needs a lot of help and attention, it makes Sam feel guilty for feeling resentful. There are so many different feelings Sam experiences!

Brotherly Feelings explores the emotions that siblings of children with Asperger's Syndrome (AS) commonly experience. With illustrations throughout, this book will help siblings to understand that their emotional responses - whatever they are - are natural and OK. It is the ideal book for parents and professionals to use with siblings to discuss their emotional experiences, and will also help children with AS to form an understanding of the feelings of other family members.


Sam Frender is eight years old. He is in second grade. He lives in North Carolina with his parents, his older brother, Eric, who has Asperger's Syndrome, and his two cats. His hobbies are listening to music, telling jokes, playing with Lego, and reading. He is very interested in math, science, and art. When he grows up, he would like a career that will enable him to help people. Robin Schiffmiller is Eric and Sam's mother. She founded a Sibling Support Group for children with siblings on the Autism Spectrum, and is the Director of Sibling Support for a local chapter of the Autism Society of North Carolina.
The book is written by eight year old Sam, whose older brother has Asperger's. Sam says exactly how it is being the sibling - the good and the bad bits. He tells it how it really is - a breath of fresh air!
National Chilminding Association
When I was asked to write a review for this book, my mom wanted to make sure that I did indeed readt the entire book. My response to her. "I am the book!" Brotherly Feelings perfectly describes what my life is like, having a brother with Asperger's Syndrome. Sam and his mon wrote this book so other kids would know what it feels like to live with a brother or sister who has Asperger's Syndrome. The authors do a great job describing all the mixed feelings that come along with having to identify their feelings, positive and negative, and offers some suggestions on how to learn how to cope with these emotions. What I like best about Brotherly Feelings, is that it made me realize that not all my feelings about my brother are negative and that even though he can be a real pain in the butt sometimes, we do have a good relationship, and I love him just the way he is. I highly recommend this book to anyone who would like to know what it feels like to have a brother or sister on the autism spectrum. You don't have to be a sibling in order to read this book. My grandmother read it and she found it to be very helpful in understanding about Asperger's Syndrome. She said it even helped her to better understand what my family experiences.
Asperger Syndrome and High Functioning Autism Association On the Spectrum Newsletter
`It's really easy to read, with wonderful line drawings to illustrate the points. The artist is fantastic and captures the different emotions wonderfully. Sam is so honest about his feelings, which may make you sad, but also makes you laugh, describing what Eric gets up to. He shows that Eric may be different but he's very much part of the family, and makes a positive contribution to family life.'
National Childminding Association
Brotherly Feelings explores the emotions that siblings of children with Asperger's Syndrome commonly experience. An excellent book for play specialists working with children and young people on the autistic spectrum which could be used as an aid to explaining Asperger's Syndrome and/or to encourage siblings to express and explore their emotions.
The Journal of the National Association of Hospital Play Staff
Sam loves Eric and can't imagine life without him, but sometimes living with him can be difficult, because Eric has Asperger Syndrome. Trying to make sense of the complicated feelings he has about Eric, Sam has written Brotherly Feelings: Me, My Emotions and My Brother with Asperger's Syndrome. Sam describes the loving but resentful emotions he experiences and talks about the effect of Eric's Asperger on his own life. Brothers and sisters of children with special needs can often feel neglected and lonely. Sam hopes that others in similar situations will read the book and be comforted, as sharing his own conflicting feelings has helped him.
Mychild
It's good to see a book about how Asperger's affects the family. Siblings are often forgotten because of the needs of the child with Asperger's. Sam makes this point in the book and shows how he copes with this.
National Childminding Association

Table of Contents

Section Title Page Action Price
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS vii
PREFACE viii
INTRODUCTION 1
1 Women in water management and technology 3
Women's roles in traditional water management 3
Women in the decade 1981-90 4
2 The importance of an improved water supply 8
Benefits of better water 8
The reasons for good projects 9
Suitable design 10
The influence of women 12
Involving both women and men 14
Not all women are the same! 17
3 Options for an improved water supply 19
Technology and gender 19
Water sources: groundwater 20
Water sources: spring water 22
Water sources: rainwater harvesting 27
Lifting water 31
Transporting water 37
Piped water supply 41
Water purification 44
4 Gender in the project cycle 50
Project identification 50
Gender and personnel 53
Introducing a project 54
Participatory evaluation 57
5 A checklist for planners and evaluators 59
Gender policy/attitudes 59
Baseline 59
Further preparation 60
Participation and workload 60
Entry points 60
Construction, management, maintenance and actual use 60
Steps towards involvement of particular groups 61
Wrap-up questions 61
6 Detailed case studies . 63
Improved water supply, Indonesia 63
Participatory development planning, Kenya 63
Handpump maintenance, Sri Lanka 64
Community-managed water supply systems, Colombia 64
A lesson learned about gender, Malawi 65
Distribution of bleach powder by women's groups, India 67
RESOURCES 69
REFERENCES 71